Redefining My Service

We left the United States a little over a year ago. I have been waiting for the right time to post and talk about work, looking for a success story or a little more clarity into why we are here. It has taken this entire year to understand that my Peace Corps service is open ended, undefined, and simply vague for a reason. As volunteers, we are only required to work 20 hours a week at our primary assignment. When becoming volunteers, we were relieved of many burdens that might affect productivity. Medical care is easily accessible and provided, along with a suitable living wage, housing, and support from staff. We are given so much free time and freed of anything that might inhibit us from being professional volunteers. A concept that I did not understand until recently.

Last winter, we finished training, arrived in community, laid low for the winter (as seemed to be the common practice), and then started our work assignments. In my school, I spent the next few months fighting against the established system to implicate practices I thought would make teaching look familiar and, from my opinion, more effective. I was unsuccessful. After a few months, I felt unaccomplished and like a burden to my counterpart. I felt further unfulfilled because 20 hours of obligations a week left me with ample free time compared to the life I had back home where I was trying to balance work, school, friends and family. I used my free time to watch more movies and TV shows then I had ever before, jokingly justifying it by telling myself I was “catching up on pop culture,” the American pop culture my students are so plugged into. I should have been filling that free time with community actions and other means of volunteerism.

Peace Corps equips us with language skills and trains us to learn the needs of our community with the idea that we will work with locals to improve the community in some way. We were greeted in Delcevo with open arms and grand ideas for change.  I simply said “Great! When can I start?” and then waited for some direction. I realize now I am the one to get things started. There are passionate and kind-hearted people here who will help, but they also have jobs, families, and other responsibilities. I, on the other hand, am a professional volunteer. I should be devoting my time. That is why I am here. I am also learning they don’t know where to start either. They are looking for direction just as I have been.

I started a new school year September 1st, and life is looking up. I am trading in the things that are relevant to me culturally, like timeliness and grades, for better relationships with students and teachers. It is paying off. I am less frustrated, and my counterpart and I have a better relationship. We are planning more because I am easier to work with; and therefore, we are trying some new things. One, being an attempt to read Harry Potter with the students. This has been challenging so far. It is hard to get the students interested in anything, and this may be too big of a commitment right now. If I can be a better teacher and get the students to buy into it, I think it will be very rewarding.

In this second year, I am taking responsibility for any lack of work I have, because as a professional volunteer, I need to create work for myself. Not all work has to be grandeur or socially significant. It just needs to be something that wouldn’t have existed without my help, like introducing some people to tacos, or getting a few students interested in hiking or environmental conservation. These are all things I love and are simple, but have the potential to build relationships and leave at least a small impression.

-Jarred